The Grammy Noms Are In…

Well. It’s that time of year again.

Anyone who knows me knows that the Grammys lost any semblance of credibility for me in 2015, when Morning Phase, an album all of fifty people heard about, beat Beyonce’s surprise self-titled release for Album of the Year. I don’t care how brilliant Beck is, how long he’s been in the music industry, how nice it was that he finally got recognition for a supposedly better album released years prior. It was the snub of the decade, the century, and I have not recovered.

So. I’m very ambivalent when it comes to the Grammys, but as a dedicated consumer of all that is pop culture, I find that I cannot turn up my nose and ignore them as I so desperately want. While I’d sooner swallow an explosive than watch the actual ceremony, the speculative writing and posturing and campaigning that precede the circus is what I live for.

So here are some of my initial thoughts and musings about the 2020 Grammy Award nominations:

• These Album of The Year nominations are more or less what I expected. Little Nas X’s 7 however, is a shock to the system. I didn’t even know EPs could be nominated.
• Taylor Swift not nominated for Album of The Year? I love this song.
• The Best New Artist Category is fucking stacked. My heart is with Tank and Bangas but they’ll be singing ‘it’s an honor just to be nominated” all season, unfortunately.
• Spirit? For Best Pop Vocal? I…. guess?
• Am I the only one who couldn’t stand Ariana’s song with Social House?
• I can’t believe “Señorita” was nominated for Best Pop Duo/Group Performance and “I Know What You Did Last Summer” was not. We all know what the superior track is.
• I can’t believe “Señorita” was nominated period, this is so ugly.
• The Gift nominated for Best Pop Album???! It’s like, a single rung above a compilation soundtrack what is going ON?!
• Michael Bublé is still releasing Traditional Pop albums? That’s nice.
• Cage The Elephant is still releasing music? That’s nice too.
• Are these really the best R&B performances that we had this year? I think I’ve listened to maybe two of them.
• How many genres are we really gonna shoehorn Lizzo into? Traditional R&B? Against the queen herself India.Arie? Okayyyyyy?
• No Guidance for best R&B song???? I have to go.
• Ella Mai for best R&B Album? I really have to go.
• Suge deserves Best Rap Performance. There. I said it.
• “Clout is the dumbest song I’ve ever heard in my entire life”- Whitney, really summing it up
• YBN Cordae?????!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!! LMFAOOOOOO
• (Better him than Blueface, I guess)
• Speaking of, where is all the female rap talent? Rico? Doja? Megan? Tierra Whack?
• Willie Nelson is still alive?!
• Reba McEntire better win Best Country Album. And I’m not just saying that because she’s the only name I recognize on this list
• I wonder what New Age music sounds like
• Happy to see that the Contemporary Christian roster really hasn’t budged in the last ten years
• BURNA BOY!
• I would really like to see FINNEAS win for production.
• Wow, there are a lot of categories for this damn thing

So there you have it. Winners will be announced on January 26, 2020, with Alicia Keys (?!?!?!?!?!?!?) leading the charge once again. Whatever.

I’m so bored.